Confessions Of A New Mother – Uncensored!

Confessions Of A New Mother – Uncensored!

overwhelming. that one word summarises the past month.

hamza is four week two days old today and it has been insane. suddenly my life revolves around this screaming crying lil being on a sleep-feed-poop routine. the sleepless nights are more manageable now. at least he no longer bawls – the first few nights i swear the whole cck north six were woken by him.

tak takut ker?

penat doesn’t even begin to describe how i feel. it seems that nothing is easy with hamza. he cries at everything. and his cry is not like his cousin ilyas’s cry – that of a cat, more a whimper really. oh no siree…hamza’s cry is the true blue test of healthy his lungs are. the deafening-highpitched-lip-quivering-face-turning-red-and- then-blue kind of cry, which automatically stops when i pick him up. this means every time he’s asleep, i have about two to three hours to eat, bathe, do whatever i can around the house and catch some sleep myself before he is up again.

and don’t even get me started on breastfeeding. for the record, YES I KNOW breastmilk is the best milk. YES I KNOW mothers should breastfeed their baby for as long as possible. YES I KNOW there are abundant benefits of a mother’s milk. but NO I DIDN’T KNOW that for the first few days after birth, you won’t get anything or if you’re lucky, you’ll already be producing colostrum. NO I DIDN’T KNOW that your breast will no longer be yours, they’re the baby’s to feed on demand. NO I DIDN’T KNOW that my back, shoulders and arms will ache from remaining in the breastfeeding position for extended periods of time. and what about the stress of holding a crying kicking screaming baby to your breast as you try to guide his mouth to the correct latching angle? and guess what? as soon as that’s done, you still have to subject them mammary to the breast pump – if you’re like me, trying to build up sufficient supply for when i go back to work. they didn’t tell me all this! (or maybe they did, i just wasn’t paying attention in the antenatal class.) breastfeeding is an art, not something that a mother and her baby does easily right from the start. kudos to those who do, but for those who don’t, i can surely understand why they gave up and switched to formula. it does not make them any lesser than a mother. i think there’s too much pressure on mothers to breastfeed their baby – i for one felt very pressured in the earlier days, so much so that i felt like a failure for not being able to feed hamza. i cried when he cried of hunger. i cried when aby fed him formula. i felt so useless at that time. thankfully, the stressful days are over. once you get over the beginning, have faith! it’ll get better and easier. syukur

alhamdulillah thanks to God aby has been fully participative (is there such a word?) right from the labour until today, i have never felt like i am alone or lost, he’s always there with an equal say of what’s going on with hamza, waking up for night feeds, taking over the subuh shift when i collapse, cooking me meals, doing the household chores – basically doing everything i stopped doing. and this amidst his work and classes. on my more emotional days, i would cry and tell him i’m sorry he has to all this. he’d hold me and say “you’re doing a far more important duty.”

syukur alhamdulillah thanks to God i also have the support of family around. both neneks are ever-willing to take hamza off our hands for us to run errands and what-nots. we even had a little down time to catch indiana jones. and of course the wonderful friends who dropped by to celebrate our birthdays.

faizal, mazlan, fahmee, emi and baby ammar on aby's birthday

yani, baby aliyah, aisah, liza and azad on my birthday.

zack/nadz/kak al: i don’t have photos from your visit! email me can?

we had a very quite and simple celebration of our second wedding anniversary – falling asleep in front of the tv with hamza in his abi’s arms.

so that’s my update for the month. nobody said motherhood is easy and i know it’ll get harder. for now i’m going to end this post with the cliché of all clichés…

whenever i kiss his bubble gum tummy, it's all worth it. i wouldn't want it any other way.

Here's Looking At You, Babe

Here's Looking At You, Babe

world, please meet amir hamza bin shahbudin, who arrive on Friday 25 April 2008 bersamaan dengan 18 Rabiulakhir 1429H at 11.46pm, weighing in at a healthy 3.28kg.

amir hamza, meet the world. : )

will be back with more once things settle down, insya Allah.

A Tale Of Two Floods & The Domesticated Me

A Tale Of Two Floods & The Domesticated Me

"cause you were just too busy being fabulous, too busy to think about us..." - the eagles

what a week. it started with the flash floods at my workplace, which caused the entire building to stay in office for an hour last thursday as the roads and exits were completed underwater. five cars were stranded in the middle of the road as their owners waded about in calf-high water.

then there was the other flood happening in my .. erm... down there. it started the night before and seemed to be wet till the next day. strangely, i didn't panic. i called aby, who did. in his strange calm way. so i called NUH's delivery suite and the midwife told me to come in immediately, so nice to ask if i'd like an ambulance to fetch me. looking at the five cars from the office window, i said "no thanks, can i go home first?" for some strange reason i really wanted to take a bath and eat something first. she said as soon as possible after dinner. we arrived at the hospital just after nine pm. told to report at the A&E department, i was promptly plonked into a wheelchair and whisked away to the ward within two minutes, taking an express elevator.

it was there that my embarrassing moments happened. firstly the nurse there just told me to remove all clothing from waist down. in my mind, "huh, no gown, or skirt, or blanket? seriously?" i looked at her. she wore a stern "hurry-up-i-see-these-things-everyday!" look on her face. fine.

then the registrar came in to conduct the examination, signalling the start of the second embarrassing moment. the nurse moved me into position and of course by reflex, i unmoved them. she made a "tsk" sound and forced my legs to comply. *sob* macam nak nangis. aby held my hand while i tried to cut off the circulation from his wrist.

ok ok i hear many of you saying that yes, they are professionals, and yes they do these everyday, and yes, there's nothing to be embarrassed about. but still i feel malu ok. i mean, it's my first time having someone other than the one i don't have a batasan aurat with looking and touching my down there. yeah people tell me later on in the delivery suite it'll be worse, but i'll be too high from the gas or in throes of pain to notice anything or care about anything. i'll cross that bridge when i get to it. in the mean time, call me a prude. or if anyone has useful tips on how to cope/get used to it, do share.

anyway...i tested positive for leaking liqua, so kena warded immediately. at that moment, i never felt more thankful to be a staff of the Group, hence being entitled to an A1 room where aby could room in with me. my gynea came in at eight am the next morning and sent me for a scan. water level: good. weight of baby: very good. (read: 2.6kg!!!) mommy's temperature: normal. so rest in bed one more day for observation and then with a dose of antibiotics + 10 day hospitalisation leave, i was allowed home on saturday. yay! what a dress rehearsal for the real thing.

so what have i been doing at home? lotsa sleeping! and tv-watching. and cleaning and putting things away. my kitchen's finally done.

yeah, that's it. small and cozy. i realize it's far from resembling nigella's but let's call it a work in progress. the first dish i cooked in it was my all-time favourite dish to cook. spaghetti. nothing fancy schamancy. : )

in case you're wondering, the top picture is how normal people eat pasta. the bottom one is covered with cheese, which is how anak2 & cucu jamil eat things - we just can't get enough of cheese.

and today i finished washing all the baby's clothes. or at least what he'll need for the first few weeks of his life. i washed them. by hand.

step terror eh? i think it'll be the first and last time. next time, it'll be mr washing machine.

i'm going back to work on monday, where it will be the last three weeks before i go on maternity, insya Allah. i wanna do a proper and complete handover so that life there can go on smoothly without me. also one of my team members will be going on maternity in november, so i think i should set a good example, doncha think?

gosh, this is a long entry seh. penat saya type. penat awak baca?

The Kite Runner

The Kite Runner

this review rating deserves 10000 stars.


finally the long awaited movie is out and i caught it at 10 something on sunday after the cny weekend. gila kan? firstly i did not know it was released in singapore already and secondly i did not know it was playing at the cathay and cineleisure only. aiyayayayai...

i though i would cry buckets. i stuffed my bag with tissue and aby took the tissue box from the car...just in case. but suprisingly i did not cry. not when hassan was hurt, not at the orphanage scene, not when amir came back to kabul. well, i did tear at the part where amir and his father was escaping to pakistan and that horrible russian soldier "wanted half-an-hour with that lady". that scene used up half a tissue. laughing so hard when amir's dad met the russian doctor later used up the other half.

but overall i am di atas happy and satisfied that this movie did not stray very far from the book. it was 95% accurate and the screenplay writer kept the spirit and essence of the book. so unlike da vinci where the movie totally mised the point.

ticket value: worth buying the DVD box set.

best line in the movie - hassan : "but couldn't he have just smelt an onion?"

Honeymoon Feb 08

Honeymoon Feb 08

aby and i sneaked off to our third honeymoon from 2nd - 4th Feb 2008 at The Pulai Desaru Beach Resort. aware that this was probably the last lepak holiday we can take just the two of us for a long time, we really relaxed to the max without a care in the world. of course, no water sports, but lots of sleeping, eating and lazy strolls in the drizzle.

here are the highlights.

ps: hmn...where shall we go next honeymoon?

It Finally Happened

It Finally Happened

"the weight of the things that remained unspoken, built up so much it crushed us everyday" - maroon five

hehehee...today it happened for the first time.

this guy offered me his seat on the train. i looked around as to who he was offering it for, then he pointed at me and smiled.

"for you, miss."

HAHEHAHAHEHAEHAEHAHEHAH! gosh, i must really look fat.

The World Is Really Right

The World Is Really Right
"my prince under disguise, how you fooled me with those eyes" - katherine mcphee

aby suprised me by showing up at cck polyclinic for my check-up.

i had countless home made epok-epok. masak dua, makan satu. yum.

ooooh! oh! and! get this! borhan and jonied chocolate chip cookie dough can eat!

Chocolate liquor, also known as cocoa liquor and cocoa mass, is a smooth liquid form of chocolate. It contains both cocoa solids and cocoa butter in roughly equal proportion.

It is produced by taking cocoa beans that have been fermented, dried, roasted, and separated from their shells and grinding their center, the cotyledon. The chocolate liquor can then be cooled and molded into blocks known as unsweetened baking chocolate. The liquor and blocks contain roughly 53 percent cocoa butter. Chocolate liquor contains no alcohol.

Crème de cacao is a sweet chocolate liqueur flavored primarily by the cocoa bean and the vanilla orchid. It is normally made as a clear light syrup, however it is also available in a dark (caramel)-colored syrup, known as Dark Crème de cacao.

The alcoholic content of this liqueur can vary, but 20–25%ABV (40–50 proof) is common.

source: wikipedia

The World Is Right

The World Is Right
"when the rain is pouring down, and my heart is hurting. you will always be around" - alicia keys

the sohabahs bullied food from an innocent staff for a pregnant woman (tsk!), got lost along expressways, ate naked fish, got rubbed, kneaded and pressed with olive oil, got eaten by naked fish and had prata to round off the day.

aby found a shop that sells ruffles sour cream and cheddar at just $3.25.

my bestest thither in da vorld is back home with the little monkey.

despite all odds, hady mirza is the first asian idol.

i'm finally going to eat home made epok-epok on hari raya haji.

the world is right again. : )

What Is Done, Is Done

What Is Done, Is Done

"if there's no one beside you when your soul embarks, then i'll follow you into the dark" - death cab for cutie

excuse my long absence from the blogging domain. lots have happened, and every time i felt like documenting it, i just couldn’t find the words for it. extreme case of writer’s block i guess.

maybe it was the concussion from the accident. suffice to say, it was a life-changing event, not just for me but also for a special person. one of my sohabahs. the police ruled that i was in the wrong – never mind there was a huge lorry blocking my view. never mind the other driver himself admitted he was rushing and was doing ninety on a fifty road. never mind. i’ve paid the fine and clocked the demerit points. moral of the story, accidents happen. learn from your mistakes. and people have commented that i am a much cautious driver since the accident, though in the beginning it was hard. people who used to depend on me for the rides started criticizing my driving skills. i didn’t hear them complaining when i drove them around, getting them to places here and there. never mind.

the biggest thing that i do mind was that one of my sohabahs was hurt. and i take full responsibility for it. chillis, i’ve apologized before but words just seem so shallow and inadequate. how can i possibly understand what you’re going through now? if i could turn back the time, i would have paid more attention to where we were going and made the correct turn. i felt something inside me die when i learnt just how injured you were and that it would mean for you – the pain, medication and therapy and your other commitments especially your schoolwork. of my twenty-four years of life i’ve hurt so many people before, emotionally and mentally, intentionally or purposely. some i have apologized for. others i will carry to my grave. but this is the first time ever that i’ve actually caused someone to be in physical pain. and there’s absolutely nothing i can do about it. i am forever indebted to you. so please tell me how i can repay you back. for the loss time, for all the hurt and pain. i will do my best to make it up to you.

and so i’ve decided to do this. i’ve decided to be a much better person from now on. not just to chillis but to everyone. i’ve decided to be a better friend, a better daughter, better wife, better everything. i’ll listen more and judge less, love more and fight less, pray more and complain less. so y’all feel free to remind me of what i’ve decided here, if i slip up and go back to my old ways.

aby commented that i’m much quieter these days. he’s been amazing all this time, staying by me whenever i was with the traffic police making the reports and settling the car insurance. during the fasting month he got up himself, made sahur and brought it to bed to me. when i was throwing out my stomach and the rest of my internal organs, he brought the dustbin to catch my puke and rubbed my back. some nights he stayed up and cried with me. he’s helped half of my emotional recovery. the rest comes from the visits and supports from my family and friends. my family, typical of their style, the marah-dulu-paham-kendian approach, has helped keep me grounded. and friends’ care and concern has helped me find myself a little bit. even friends who didn’t know about the accident or the pregnancy helped, by giving me the much-needed breathing space or else i’d suffocated with all the attention.

i owe everyone a lot of prayers. a lot.

The End Of Time

yesterday after our prayers i looked out the window hoping to catch a glimpse of this.

and to my amusement, so many other heads were popping out of windows. alas, the moon's eclipse path did not pass by our skies.

i told aby how amazing it is that such a phenomenon can happen under God's grace. at precisely the same time, all around the world people are looking at exactly the same thing. we mere humans can never dream of replicating such an occurrence.

then aby reminded me that such signs warn of the impending akhir zaman – the end of time. in skolah ugama when i was younger, ustazahs always used to warn that Rasullulah feared for his ummah, as the time between then and the end of time was this short (separate your thumb and index finger about one inch). that was why he led solat gerhana mata hari/bulan when these occurrences happened, praying for God to protect us from the coming of the dajjal.

just think, in just this lifetime alone, how many solar/lunar eclipses have there been? the one that happened yesterday was the second this year; the first one was in march. for the past ten years, the earth saw an average of 2.5 lunar eclipses per year. scientists are already predicting the next one to be on 21 feb 2008. for the solar eclipse, which is supposed to be an even more rarer occurrence happened an average of 2.4 times a year.

therefore i concluded that the night of 28 august 2007 is a blessed night indeed. it being nisfu syaaban + eclipse + it was raining very heavily the whole day = one blessed night. so if the end of time was really very near, then yesterday was just another one of the signs.

so what do you do when there are signs that the end of time is near? move into a mosque? quit your job and stay on the sajadah all day all night? start memorizing the holy quran before its text disappear from its pages?

Angry!

Angry!

i bought a bedsheet set that promised one fitted sheet, one bolster case and two pillow cases, i only got one fitted sheet, one bolster case and ONE pillow case in the package.

ANGRY!

i got a craving for my all-time fave comfort food ruffles sour cream and cheddar cheese which used to cost only 2.35 but when i went to buy it yesterday it was selling at 2.95.

ANGRY!!

i woke up early like a good pseudo housewife to do the three loads of laundry i've been procrastinating. and the moment i pressed the "wash" button, it started to rain. for a good THREE hours.

*sigh*....

I Must Not

I Must Not...

...get addicted to honour and passion...

...get addicted to honour and passion...

...get addicted to honour and passion...

how not to ?????????

go away...the last time i was this in crush with a local channel eight actor was in 1995 with thomas ong in the brothers five.

Bye Bye Bye!

i bought the phone on friday and i lost the phone on wednesday.

just my luck.

please email me omnichups@yahoo.com your number for my new sim card.

thanks lah.

(Un)Happy Birthday To Me

woah so sad.

i did not expect my last day to be so sad. i was dreaming of a sweet departure from the wayang drama agency, despite the last minute negotiation to get me to to change my mind about leaving. who knew i'd accumulate 6 boxes and 4 paper bags of stuff during the 42 months stay? and of course, daniel had to send me that photo of william as my last email. i had said i was not going to cry, but i should have never opened that attachment. worst, i had given all my tissue boxes away to bruce and emie.

they sent me downstairs, emir, strongkopi & TW, with me pushing my trolley of boxes and paperbags and umbrella. the cab was waiting. they helped to load the cab and final bubbyes and promises to stay in touch, then i left. and sobbed all the way home. apek still can say, "ah miss ah, behind your head there got tissue hor." thanks lah apek.

met aby at the carpark and he helped to carry the stuff upstairs. in bed, i continued sobbing in his arms while he pooh-ed and pah-ed at my little breakdown, saying i should try and not get so worked up by getting so emotionally attached and involved to the place. whatever it is, leave it behind and channel the feeling to something constructive.

constructive it is. it is my birthday this morning, and i just spent 3 hours un-packing the stuff i brought home, and whaddaya know...i have an anecdote for every time. i ended up putting all the stuff back in the boxes and see if i can try clearing them another day. so much for being constructive.

(un)happy birthday to me.

Allah Selamatkan Aby Saya

happy birthday aby! you only deserve the most bestest wife in the world.

how lucky. : )

I AM FREE

I AM FREE!

i'm free! it's done! yay!

"All praises belong to Allah the Cherisher, the Sustainer, Developer and Perfector of the worlds, the most Compassionate, the Merciful."

Peterpan's Latest Album May 2007

Peterpan's Latest Album May 2007

and PETERPAN IS BACK! iloveitiloveitiloveit!

you can hear their growth in their songs, with new dimensions of tunes weaved into the harmonies. and listening to ariel's voice reminded me why i fell hard for them in the first place.

the songs are DEMO versions, you've gotta wait for the full release of the album eh?

sneak preview at Peterpan's Latest Album May 2007 !

Honeymoon Bintan April 2007

Honeymoon Bintan April 2007

aby and me were in bintan from 28 apr to 1 may 2007, making use of the april long weekend promotion. it was an early second honeymoon for us since we will be super occupied during our birthdays and anniversary. it was a nice close for aby as he moves on in his career, and me starting a new portfolio in july and a good start into our second year of married life.



see Honeymoon Bintan Apr07 for more pics.

Neologisms

NEOLOGISMS

The Washington Post publishes a contest for readers in which they are asked to supply alternate meanings for various words.

Coffee (n.), a person who is coughed upon.

Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.

Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.

Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent

Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightie.

Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.

Gargoyle (n.), an olive-flavored mouthwash.

Flatulence (n.) the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.

Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.

Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.

Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified demeanor assumed by a proctologist immediately before he examines you.

Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish expressions.

Circumvent (n.), the opening in the front of boxer shorts.

Frisbeetarianism (n.), The belief that, when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck there.

Pokemon (n), A Jamaican proctologist.

Bustard (n.), a rude bus driver.

Semantics (n.), pranks conducted by young men studying for the priesthood.

Spatula: n. A fight among vampires.

Excruciate: n., the ligament that attaches your ex-wife to your paycheck.

Perplexed: adj., lost in a movie theater.

Population: n., that nice sensation you get when drinking soda.

Racket: n., a small pair of breasts.

Nincompoop: n., the military command responsible for battlefield sanitation.

Ineffable: adj., describes someone you absolutely cannot swear in front of.

Pontificate: n., a document given to each graduating pope.

Pimple: n., pimp's apprentice.

Discussion: n., a Frisbee-related head injury.

Ozone: n., area in which the G-spot is located.

Flattery: n., a place that manufactures A and B cup brassieres only.

Cabbage Patch: A patch for those trying to stop eating cabbage.

Sudafed: A software program on how to file a civil action against the government.

Pop Secret: Paternity suit settled without publicity.

Oral-B: Monica's grade on her last intern evaluation.

The Washington Posts Style Invitational also asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. This yielded:

Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the reader who doesn't get it.

Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of obtaining sex.

Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously.

Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.

Karmageddon: End of the world due to a build up of bad-vibes.

Glibido: All talk and no action.

Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

Intaxication: Euphoria at receiving a tax refund, which lasts until you realise it was your money to start with.

Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

Tumfoolery: When a middle-aged man sucks in his stomach while being introduced to an attractive woman

Fadavers: Last year's hot fads.

Main Geeze: How an elderly, unmarried couple refer to each other.

Polarvoid: The state of having no baby pictures, a condition that usually befalls the second-born child.

Dozie: The lie a person tells when a telephone caller wakes him up and he denies that he was sleeping.

Hooternanny: The au pair you thought was especially promising, but your wife sent back to the agency.

Alexpandria: A town known for its buffet restaurants.

Apocalypstic: The little smudge I came home with on my collar that makes my wife act like it's the end of the world.

Defenestraction: A ruse to divert the cop's attention while you throw the evidence out the window.

Accimental: Caused by a Freudian slip.

Algaebra: What the Little Mermaid wears over her chest.

Aliass: A body double for a nude scene.

Arbyss: The deepest part of the stomach, reserved for two Giant Roast Beefs, large Curly Fries and a chocolate shake.

Avant-harde: Before the Cialis kicks in.

Doltergeist: a spirit that decides to haunt someplace stupid, such as your septic tank.

Guillozine: a magazine for executioners.

Buzz Words and Phrases for the 21st Century

BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.

SEAGULL MANAGER: A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves.

CHAINSAW CONSULTANT: An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee headcount, leaving the top brass with clean hands.

CUBE FARM: An office filled with cubicles.

MOUSE POTATO: The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.

PRAIRIE DOGGING: When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.

SITCOMs: (Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage) What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids.

STARTER MARRIAGE: A short-lived first marriage that ends in divorce with no kids, no property and no regrets.

STRESS PUPPY: A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.

SWIPED OUT: An ATM or credit card that has been rendered useless because the magnetic strip is worn away from extensive use.

TOURISTS: People who take training classes just to get a vacation from their jobs. "We had three serious students in the class; the rest were just tourists."

TREEWARE: Hacker slang for documentation or other printed material.

XEROX SUBSIDY: Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from one's workplace.

CHIPS & SALSA: Chips = hardware, Salsa = software. "Well, first we gotta figure out if the problem's in your chips or your salsa."

PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE: The fine art of whacking the heck out of an electronic device to get it to work again. (Try not to dent the case.)

SALMON DAY: The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die in the end.

CLM: (Career Limiting Move) Used among microserfs to describe ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM.

ADMINISPHERE: The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.

DILBERTED: To be exploited and oppressed by your boss. Derived from the experiences of Dilbert, the geek-in-hell comic strip character."I've been Dilberted again. The old man revised the specs for the fourth time this week."

404: Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message"404 Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located. "Don't bother asking him ... he's 404, man."

What Da Heck Does That Mean?

What Da Heck Does That Mean?

"luminous marrow murmurs lightning praise."

who can tell me what this means?